fflo: (Default)
[personal profile] fflo
  Sleep plenty. Start before 2
  most nights. Hydrate. Eat
  often, and take lots of time
  with plan, and gather, and
  prep. And, as you & she would
  aim: more than one thing.
  Willy-nilly. Avaunt! Heigh-ho.

  Don't worry about money. It's o.k.;
  smart enough, for now---fret not.
  See every movie you might like,
  and breakfast with any who will.

  Take walks. Spend hours with
  the dying leaves. Get a little
  chilly and go inside to warm up.
  Remember the bathtub. Love Chet
  well (that may leave thee ere long).

  Try the steering fluid. Sell the
  Jeep. You can do it. It can end its
  motoring days with another. Just
  take out the sentimental rocks.

  Finally: don't even try not to
  think of that one, but practice
  giving up wishes. They're right,
  Polly's Buddhists, though you're
  not altogether with them. Now go on

  and sing songs to yourself, and ponder
  inertia, cuz it applies to motion, too.

  Mix well, until firm. Serves one.

  Enjoy.



Of course this comes out with thoughts of that little Larry Ferlinghetti that fits so well on a postcard, the list recipe poem I used to do variations of in my head (as Denise used to write her own personalized "My Favorite Things" now & then):


     Recipe For Happiness Khaborovsk Or Anyplace

  One grand boulevard with trees
  with one grand café in sun
  with strong black coffee in very small cups.

  One not necessarily very beautiful
  man or woman who loves you.

  One fine day.

                               --Lawrence Ferlinghetti


Is that a great poem, or what? Of course the lover-of-you is great, but so are the strong coffee and the very small cups. And the bisexuality, and the un-"looks"ist-ness. And the way the last line, like "Serves six. Enjoy!" (all my mother's recipes seemed to end with "Enjoy"), is almost implicitly a conclusion/product of the cooking, as well as a step/ingredient.

Okay, I just went up and tacked on that last two lines in mine. Though the recipeness of the title is kinda oblique/afterthought by then. Yeah, I think they should be cut. Do you?

[Poll #343741]


(Thanks for the cantaloupe, BAM. And for the cantaloupe thought.)

polls

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 07:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maffick.livejournal.com
I like the "firm" line. I think it suggests a desire to try to commit to your plan. We humans hardly ever actually stay firm on anything, so I think that the potential for it to not be a firm plan is felt by all of us. And who ever gets a recipe exactly right--not to be too literal. But it goes with the tone of the rest of the poem, and the desire to stick to it is honorable.

I love Betty Ferlinghetti! Wasn't there a character in Greece or someting called Betty Spaghetti?

Re: polls

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 08:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fflo.livejournal.com
Yeah, you got it (see answer to LLY I just put above). Are you sometimes a bit more tentative than you'd like, as well? I haven't been feeling so tentative these last few days, for some reason. I like it. I hope it lasts.

Betty Spaghetti should marry Betty Ferlinghetti, and then they can hyphenate and both be "Betty Spaghetti-Ferlinghetti"!

Re: polls

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 09:02 am (UTC)

Re: tentativeness

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 09:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maffick.livejournal.com
Also, yeah, I can be tentative often. I recently had a revelation of sorts on that relating to my bf, though. He wasn't working, and well, in a way, I wasn't saying anything to him about it b/c I was trying to be patient and not jump down his throat, but it was also the fear of confrontation that got to me. When I couldn't hold it any longer, I finally said something (besides it was going on nearly a month--too long). Even though it was neither an easy conversation nor a quickly had one, he did what I asked him to do. I realized afterwards that of course he was going to do what I asked b/c he doesn't want me to leave, so it was silly to be so tentative. I much prefer to speak my mind, which I will remind myself to do, particularly with him, more often. It sucks to let things eat at you--it sucks much more than a confrontation. And it seems like the better thing to do because if S didn't like what I had to say, then he wouldn't do it and I would leave and things would be much easier or he would do it and things would be much happier. It's a win-win situation to be more forthright I think.

Re: tentativeness

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 11:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fflo.livejournal.com
That makes sense. And good fer you, speaking up!

Often the answer to "What are you afraid of?" is fuzzy and not well-formed for me, and forcing myself to answer it helps. Usually what I'm afraid of is just the confrontation itself, and a feeling of dread at the idea of it---the sometimes visceral yet semi-conscious anticipation of how it might feel. But I've gotten better through the years at going ahead and addressing stuff, and like to think I'm still improving. Cuz it's necessary, dammit. It needs to be the policy, even if both parties hate confrontation, that unhappiness will be reported, and conflict will be addressed.

Key for me is focussing on being fair and compassionate during the process and asking/expecting the same of the other party. Like that thing of sticking to stating your own position and reports of your own feelings, fer instance. I didn't have the best role models for this kind of thing in my family of origin, but I do believe most of us can get better at it, with work (and sometimes help). Of course these dealings with conflict involve more than one person, and the other one brings her/his own baggage to the situation---which can make it complicated, given that each mix is different.

Doggone if most of the people I dearly love don't have at least a couple of suitcases! (you know, the unit of measure for baggage---ha ha ha)

Re: tentativeness

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 01:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maffick.livejournal.com
I know what your saying, girlfriend.
Have you ever seen that Church of Jesus Christ for Latter Day Saints commercial about helping families to communicate better? And the one Christian Scientist for Latter Day Saints says, "A common mistake is for people to say 'you always' or 'you never'-well first of all nobody always or nevers".
I always think about that before I know that I'm going to get into a confrontation, especially with my bf, because it IS so easy to get into that--and, it's not fair.
And as for suitcases, I probably have a trunk and half already in my short-lived life...so it goes...

Re: tentativeness

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 01:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fflo.livejournal.com
Maybe our folks load us up with baggage to prepare us for the trip that is life, and we try ever after to learn how to travel lighter. . .

Re: tentativeness

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 01:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maffick.livejournal.com
woh, way too deep for me at 5 to 5.
no, there may be something to that...hhhmmm *contemplative chin scratch* I relate to this because my parents certainly do have enough shit to fill like three houses, literally.

Re: tentativeness

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 02:01 pm (UTC)

Re: tentativeness

Date: Sep. 2nd, 2004 10:38 am (UTC)
groovesinorbit: (haring dj)
From: [personal profile] groovesinorbit
Ooh, nicely put.

Re: your newfound motion

Date: Sep. 1st, 2004 09:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maffick.livejournal.com
Yay! I hope it lasts for you, too.
fflo: (Default)
fflo

Hello.

CURRENTLY FEATURING
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Postcard of the Day

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-- Möbius, The Physicists

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